Dare I Say It? A Return to Normal?

June 4, 2021

Over fourteen months ago (441 days for those of you keeping score at home), I wrote a post titled ‘Welcome to the Temporary Normal’, a piece that I revisited as I began this week’s journey through my thoughts on the road back to normal.  I rarely go back and reread something after I wrote it.  Usually, I spend so much time on a piece, especially the last day or two editing, that I want to be done with it once I press the “publish” button.  I don’t want to find mistakes, typos, cringe-worthy jokes, or a bad take that aged poorly.  Best to leave the past in the past.  But this week, I decided to journey back to revisit my emotions in March of 2020 as we saw our lives turning upside down.

There was so much uncertainty in our world as we saw some of our worst fears unfolding on our televisions, in our hospitals, schools, businesses and homes.  Everyone in the world was impacted by a pandemic and we just didn’t know what would happen.  We worried about not getting sick, hoping family members could stay safe, and hoping beyond hope that there would be a way out sometime soon.  The word “vaccine” didn’t appear once in that post because it wasn’t even on the radar in March of 2020.  But thanks to innovative scientists, doctors, and brilliant logistics by the federal (after Jan 20^th) and state governments, we are where we are.  And that is a much better place as we turn the calendar to June 2021.

Not Taking It For Granted

After everything we’ve all been through, I’m not naïve enough to forget just how fortunate we are in our household.  No one we knew was seriously impacted by the pandemic, and our immediate family (despite other crises – minor and major – along the way) made it through the last fourteen months in one piece.  And probably closer than ever before.  As I have written before, our state has managed this as well as we could have hoped for, especially with our Governor making tough decisions, even changing his mind when he had better information – the ultimate test of a good leader. 

Our vaccination rollout was efficient and fast – our whole family was fully vaccinated by early May and we were on our way to normalcy.  Now, I say that with extreme gratitude, as I know there are many states and communities that are struggling to get a critical mass of their population vaccinated, due to access or resistance.  It’s hard to address the latter – I’m not nearly qualified enough to say who should do what with their personal life and their health.  I just know that for me (and fortunately for all of my close friends and family), the vaccination decision was an easy one.  My feeling is that there is risk in all walks of life.  The risk factors a year ago?  Very high.  Now?  With being fully vaccinated and with the stats trending very low in our state?  Much lower.  And much more acceptable to my risk calculus.  Those factors made some of our decisions a little easier as we have navigated the last month or so, but it’s still a little…..weird.

Wait a Minute – This is Normal Again?

A few weeks ago, our state removed virtually all business restrictions, particularly business capacities, and the most controversial one – the mask mandate, with two conditions.  The first is that it is still required in certain settings (medical offices, schools, etc.), the second being that you had to have been vaccinated.  While the topic of “vaccine passports” has been bandied about in this country, nothing has been implemented in our state, as of yet.  And I’m ok with that.  Quite frankly, even if a policy is implemented to attend large events in the Fall (say, for a concert or two that I am attending), I wouldn’t have a problem with it.  Of course, it’s a slippery slope – where do you draw the line before it feels like a police state where you have to show a vaccine card to get into any building?  I’m not going to let my brain go there yet – let’s take this one month at a time and enjoy what we have in front of us.

So, as we worked our way back to normal, we found ourselves being able to work out in the gym and go to the grocery store without a mask.  The latter is the one that felt so strange to us.  A few days after the mandate was up, we noticed that almost everyone was still wearing masks (we checked with the staff to make sure we were following their guidelines if we were vaccinated – we were), and that was fine.  Everyone’s decision to still wear one is their own personal choice – I don’t care either way.  But it was funny, as we were walking around the store, we suddenly felt like we should have been wearing our vaccination cards in a lanyard around our necks, so people could see that we were following the rules.  Side note – let me tell you, being a “rule follower” in your DNA has been realllllly hard during these last 14 months.  It’s bad enough when you get mad at someone for not using their blinkers or blowing red lights at an intersection.  But, watching people not wearing a mask properly and walking the wrong way in the aisles at the grocery store, and not losing my sh*t?  Yeah, not easy when you are a rule follower.  OK, maybe I need another hobby.

Speaking of Which

As I have written many times before, I was fortunate that my common social activity with my friends was a sport that wasn’t impacted (too much) by the pandemic.  We were able to golf an awful lot over the last year, even if the courses were more crowded and it was tougher to get tee times – first world problem, I know.  But one of our other favorite activities was missing for the last year and a half – the neighborhood poker game.  Once we all completed our vaccinations, my friend Doug set up a game and we were all ready to go.  Nobody cared how we played or who won.  My friend David summed it up perfectly – his daughter wished him luck and he said “I don’t care how I play – I’m just happy to be out of the house.”  We all raised our glasses for a toast to being together again after way too long.  After the first few hands, we were back in our old routine – some good wins, some tough losses, but most importantly – busting each other’s chops the whole night.  And just like that, a “normal” poker game can make you appreciate what you’ve been missing.    A few weeks later, we had our first neighborhood happy hour and our trend toward normal continued.

It wouldn’t be a weekly post without a few comments about movies, right?  Well, to touch on another one of my favorite hobbies – this past week also saw some sense of normalcy back at the movies.  Now, I went to the theaters every once in a while throughout the pandemic – most of my viewings were weekday matinees where I was either the only one in the theater or one of a few people.  Have to say – it was kind of cool having a whole theater to myself to watch Tenet last fall.  Anyway, this past weekend, I ventured out to see A Quiet Place Part II when it opened in theaters.  There were more people in the theater than I have been experiencing, and that’s ok – that’s why we got vaccinated, right?  It’s all part of the risk calculus.  The movie was very good.  Excellent jump scares, great performances, and the opening 15 minutes was incredible. 

You know what else was fun about this theater experience?  Movie previews!  Well, some of them, anyway.  There were a few that look a little lackluster, but two that I am very excited about looked great.  Last Night in Soho, from director Edgar Wright (who has amassed some wonderful films including Baby Driver, Shaun of the Dead, and Scott Pilgrim vs. the World), and starring Anya Taylor-Joy (from The Queen’s Gambit) is a time-tripping thriller that looks wonderful.  You know those trailers that give you the general vibe of the movie with compelling scenes without giving away the plot?  Yeah, this is one of those.  The second trailer?  That’s right – Top Gun: Maverick.  Oh boy, is this one going to be fun.  As I was watching (and hearing) that trailer roar through the theater, all I could think about was the conversation last Summer where studios were thinking of selling some of their releases to streaming services.  It might be one thing to watch The Trial of the Chicago 7 on Netflix, but Top Gun: Maverick and No Time to Die (the new James Bond film)?  No way – those need to be on the big screen.

The Real Highlight of Back to Normal

I figured out that it’s probably been about a year and a half since I saw live music, which is a very long time for someone like me, who loves to see a show.  And while I am thrilled to have secured some concert tickets to see my favorite band this Summer, I had the joy of seeing live music in person last weekend.  But, like the grocery story experience, it was a little….weird, at least at the start. 

Our son’s band played a show at a bar in Hartford, and my friend Doug joined me to check them out.  Before we left, I received a text from my son telling me that there was still a private party going on (more on that later) and it was pretty crowded, and no one was wearing masks.  I kind of expected that, but appreciated the heads up, and we made our way to the bar.  Walking in was very surreal – it was just like 2019 – people throughout the bar, mingling, talking, laughing – just enjoying a night out and each other’s company.  But, it was definitely strange at first – another step on the journey back to normal that is taking time to arrive at the destination.  After a little while we fell back into what it was like to be in a room full of people and remember that it’s good to feel normal again.  As the opening band finished their set, the private party wrapped up and the crowd thinned out a bit before our son’s band took the stage. 

Funny side note – the private party was for a college lacrosse team in town for a tournament.  Interesting, I thought, that the team would have a party during a tournament.  Maybe they just finished earlier that day and were celebrating before heading home.  Nope, it turns out that the team was in town for the NCAA NATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIP.  The game was THE NEXT DAY.  Now, if you’re a college coach and you’re playing in a national championship, are you going to take the team out for a party at a bar the night before the game?  Yeah, me neither.  In case you were wondering, they lost.

Anyway, when the headliners came on, it was such a great feeling.  The buzz of watching live music, even for a local band that hasn’t (yet) hit the big time, was palpable.  They sounded great throughout their two hour set, mixing in a few cover songs among their extensive number of original songs.  Most of all, I noticed that this group of friends was having SO MUCH FUN on stage, truly enjoying each other’s company and experiencing the joy of playing music together.  And for me, it was a nice reminder that normal is on its way back.  There were a few things I could have done without (the sticky floors and stale beer smell you get at a bar at midnight on a Saturday night), but the music, the energy, and the slick dance moves of Drunk Lacrosse Dad (as we nicknamed him) made for a wonderful night. 

Where Do We Go From Here?

Well, it’s hard to say, as it has been for the better part of a year and a half.  How long will the vaccines last?  Will we need booster shots?  Will there be outbreaks in the Fall?  Will new variants cause problems?  Those are things that I worry about from time to time, but it’s not taking up the entirety of my brain space as it was a year ago.  And there are still a lot of problems in our country that still need to be resolved – economic, social, racial, political.  I know I can’t bury my head in the sand, but I also know that I’m enjoying whatever small slices of normal I’ve been getting these last few weeks, and I’m going to bottle that feeling and keep drinking it as long as I can.  And I hope all of you are finding your way back to some sense of normalcy too.  Onward…..

That’s it for this week.  Thanks so much for reading.  I’ll be back to my usual topic next week, with a special look at one of my favorite genres to celebrate the release of one of the iconic films from this genre thirty five years ago (yikes!).  If you would like to be notified of future posts, you can subscribe here.