Reflecting on a Most Unusual Year

January 1, 2021

One year ago today, I took a deep breath and sent a text to my two sisters and a few close friends letting them know that I was starting a new hobby, along with a link to my first post.  A few days later, I took another deep breath as I posted a message on Facebook and broadened my audience.  Fortunately, the feedback has been positive and helpful as I’ve thought through new ideas and navigated the tricky world of providing (hopefully) entertaining content and sharing personal feelings, especially as the world turned upside down over and over again in 2020. 

As I began reflecting on this year and preparing for this post, I thought back to a lunch I had with a friend and former colleague (remember lunch with friends?) back in January.  I was still getting used to telling people about this blog, unsure what people’s reactions would be.  She was very encouraging and I told her I thought it would be a fun hobby that could stretch myself outside my comfort zone, a good exercise as I navigate the post-Corporate world of my life.  I remember shrugging and saying “Eh, I’ll try it for a year and see what happens.”  At the time, I had the first several posts outlined and a handful of other ideas that were somewhere between half-baked and quarter-baked.  If I really thought about preparing ideas for almost 50 posts, I wouldn’t have cavalierly said that I would “try it for a year.”  I don’t think I truly started worrying about keeping up the pace until I was a few months in.  But, I reminded myself that I had some good momentum going and that despite my doubts, I could do this.  And then……we got to March.

What is Happening?

I imagine we will all look back on this past year and remember when we realized that shit was getting real.  I’m still amazed at how rapidly things changed in a matter of days or hours.  There are a few moments burned into my memory during those early days.  The first time I saw someone wearing a mask in a grocery store in (probably) mid-February – this was well before it became a required public health policy.  That moment when my wife said, “Maybe we should stock up on a few things at the grocery store in case things (and people) get crazy.”  Days later, we saw irrational behavior taking hold not just on social media, but in front of our very own eyes. 

In late February, before things started to feel like they might spin out of control, my wife and I were talking about our son’s impending trip to the South by Southwest festival, as part of his college job.  We wondered if we should intervene, thinking (naively), “well, it seems like it’s really just an issue overseas, so he should be fine in Texas, right?”  In early March, we went to the movies one afternoon, sitting in a packed theater, feeling uncomfortable when we heard someone cough.  Afterwards, we went to dinner at a crowded restaurant, and I started watching what I touched in a public place very carefully.  While we were at dinner, the news alert came that South by Southwest was canceled, and we were off to the races.

The next few weeks were a blur, especially the speed at which things moved.  The night the NBA canceled a game because of a player’s positive test after displaying a cavalier attitude about the virus at a press conference, I texted the news alert to my friends and said, “I bet they put a pause on the season within a week.”  Hours later, it was shut down.  Tom Hanks announced that he and his wife tested positive, which made it feel real for Americans.  As a golf fan, I watched as the PGA Tour announced over the course of 24 hours that their tournament would go on business as usual, then deciding they would continue without fans, and then shutting it down.  Their decision became clear when Disney World closed in Orlando, which was close to the tournament’s location in Florida.  Shit got real.

Everything Up in Smoke

We watched as our lives changed immediately, when we suddenly shifted our thinking to the safety of our family and friends.  Health care systems were overrun.  The videos from Italy, Spain and New York City were frightening and seemed to be straight out of a disaster movie.  We stayed inside, desperate to “flatten the curve” to help the health care system handle a massive patient influx.  As stressful as it got, I swear that there was a period of a few weeks, where it felt like everyone was taking the attitude of “we’re in this together – we can get through this.”  People seemed to be more courteous – even drivers on the roads.  I may have imagined it, but alas, it didn’t last, as what seemed like the simplest of tasks (wearing a mask) strangely took on a political meaning among the tribal nature of our deeply divided country.  Days became weeks and weeks became months of asking ourselves, “when will it end and when will things go back to normal?”  It became clear pretty quickly that “normal” was not in the cards anytime soon. 

Across the world, people saw weddings, graduations and parties go up in smoke.  Sadly, too many people got sick and an unfathomable number of people died.  The country put healthcare workers and other essential workers (a term defined overnight) in a terrible position, as they were forced to face the question of continuing to go to work, or face the prospect of not being able to pay their bills or feed their families.  In summary, our government failed us – both political parties, especially at the federal level.  There is plenty of blame to go around.  Of course, it’s easy to look backwards and play Monday Morning Quarterback, but it was pretty clear early on that people were (and still are) in desperate need of help and are not getting it.  The CARES Act passed in the Spring and the relief bill just signed into law were not enough for the people and businesses who desperately need help.  Speaking of which….

This Week’s Moment of Happiness

I usually save this for the end of the blog, but it goes hand in hand with our government’s failing that I just mentioned.  I’ll preface this by saying that the company I’m writing about is not perfect – they’ve been known to be rather juvenile and sometimes misogynist in their content, but this past week Barstool Sports, and their founder Dave Portnoy, did something pretty remarkable.  Frustrated at the lack of government support for small businesses, coupled with the public health needs to restrict their operations by state governments, he took to Twitter and his millions of followers to do something good.  He created a small business fund, with his own money to start, asked his followers to donate, and offered businesses to apply for help by submitting a video application.  Barstool also set up a merchandise store with proceeds going to the fund, Portnoy challenged his wealthy connections to donate, and people responded in droves. 

One prominent name hasn’t stepped up yet, though.  Portnoy’s had an ongoing feud with NFL commissioner Roger Goodell over the Spygate penalties he handed down on the New England Patriots.  During the NFL draft, Goodell offered to auction off an evening watching Monday Night Football with the highest bidder, with the proceeds going to charity.  Portnoy won the auction with a bid of $250,000, but was disqualified because the NFL said he didn’t pass their “background check.”  With the launch of his fund, Portnoy told Goodell that he still has the $250,000 and if Goodell would match it, they could add another $500,000 to the small business fund.  As of today, the fund has raised over $16 million, and it continues to grow, but no word from Goodell. 

Now, sometimes these grassroots charity endeavors don’t go so well (undeserving recipients, not all of the proceeds going to charity, fraud, etc.), but I hope that isn’t the case with this one.  The videos of the business owners breaking down crying when they received a Facetime call telling them that they will get funds to survive through the pandemic will rival any military reunion video that you see online.  Now, I won’t defend Portnoy or Barstool Sports for the stupid things they have done over the years, but I have to give them credit for using their financial resources and social media platform to do good work for people who desperately need help and feel like their government failed them.  One piece of good news in an otherwise frustrating month of more doom and gloom.

A Community of Eight Billion People

There were times during 2020, where I would be thinking about the pandemic and then have a jolt of reality that the entire world was experiencing some aspect of this crisis at the same time.  With other events that we read about (hurricanes, fires, floods, even terrorist events), once the news cycle moves on, it’s only still “real” to those who are experiencing the event every day in their lives.  The rest of us move on to the next story.  But this was different – everybody on the PLANET was going through this.  When I was reminded of that fact on certain days, I continued to be amazed and a little dumbfounded. 

It became clear that this year would be that “line in the sand” moment that we would think about for a long time to come, perhaps for the rest of our lives.  The only comparison I can think of is 9/11 – like when you are watching a character in an old movie effortlessly running to an airport gate and you think “Oh, this was before 9/11.”  While the pandemic was not a specific event, our way of thinking quickly changed.  As we all got used to keeping our distances from each other and wearing face masks, watching television or movies became jarring when you see two people go in for a hug and you instinctively think “COVID!”  Along these same lines, part of my brain cannot wait until I can be back in an arena or stadium watching my favorite musicians entertain tens of thousands of fans.  But part of me wonders how much anxiety I will feel the first time I am with that many people again.

The concept of “Pre-COVID” and a true “worldwide event” came to my mind recently when I discovered a podcast called “All the President’s Minutes.”  An Australian podcast host named Blake Howard thought it would be fun to do a deep examination of All the President’s Men, minute by minute.  On each episode, he plays one minute of the film and he discusses the scene, the film, journalism, politics, and filmmaking with a guest, usually a writer.  He did a similar podcast for the crime film Heat.  Howard released the podcast beginning in January 2020 and after 137 episodes, finished it in November 2020.  Considering this is one of my favorite films, as I wrote about here, I decided to give it a try.  It was funny listening to the first few episodes, because I kept asking myself “when is COVID going to become a thing that they need to talk about?” and then sure enough, when he got to March, he started discussing it.  Another reminder that we’re all experiencing something that people all over the world have dealt with.  Also, can I just say that listening to someone with an Australian accent is a pleasant and relaxing way to listen to a podcast?  I’m not sure if it’s for everyone, but I’ve been enjoying it as a distraction.

A New Way to “Connect”

While the pandemic reminded us that we are all going through a similar life experience, we also saw innovation borne out of necessity.  In February, a former colleague asked if I could help out a company he was affiliated with and I decided to meet with them.  After a few phone conversations, I was prepared to go to their offices in Fairfield County in Connecticut during the first week of March.  Now, if you don’t know Northeast geography, Fairfield County is very close to New York City and this was right when, as I eloquently described earlier, shit got real.  Days before the meeting, the gentlemen I was going to meet with mentioned that he lived in the town where the National Guard was setting up a command center for testing and that his company was no longer accepting visitors into the office.  “Ever use Zoom?” he asked.  “Um, no, what’s that?” I responded.  Of course, now Zoom has become so commonplace, the word itself has turned into a verb, like Google, but back then it was a new concept to me.

And thank goodness for video conferencing and all of the technology that we have today.  While it was refreshing to reconnect with immediate family, play board games, explore nature with a new appreciation, and even try new life experiences, the ability to stay connected with family and friends via Zoom was a blessing we didn’t even know we needed.  We had many laughs during some tough times, especially the early days.  And let’s not forget the inspiration we saw from teachers and the education community.  The ability to create something out of nothing in a short period of time to keep the learning experience of children moving forward was amazing and inspirational.

The technology also gave us a good way to lose ourselves in the world of film and television – both new ones and some of our comfort movies.  (Speaking of which, if you are getting bored with my reflections and are here for my hot takes on film, I’ll be starting my multi-part review of the year in film next week, so thanks for bearing with me.)  Another benefit we saw from Zoom was the opportunity for our favorite performers to share music with us, usually quiet acoustic performances from home.  While those were nice, I have to say that watching Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band play two songs to a small audience on Saturday Night Live a few weeks ago made me long for the joy of live music.  My favorite band was scheduled to launch their 2020 Summer tour in Connecticut on my birthday.  The show has been rescheduled for 2021 – fingers crossed that it will happen and I will be there singing and dancing and forgetting about this past year.

Crisis Creates Innovation

One of the aspects of the pandemic that I continue to marvel at is the dramatic difference it has had on businesses.  On one end of the extreme, you had businesses thriving like companies with strong online products (like Zoom and Netflix), or online retailers (like Amazon).  Even certain brick and mortar stores flourished, as long as they could stay open, like grocery stores.  On the other end, you had businesses that were stopped cold – anything to do with travel (airlines and hotels, in particular), and businesses that couldn’t stay open, like restaurants and movie theaters, which I have written about extensively.  When the weather warmed up in parts of the country, and more was learned about the virus, outdoor dining became more commonplace and businesses innovated to turn parking lots into dining areas.  It was nice to see this innovation as businesses did what they could to hang on, but far too many business owners ran out of time and money and were forced to close.  We also saw the best of innovation in the early days, when companies shifted their production facilities to make valuable PPE for healthcare workers.  It was a win-win – hospital systems needed the product, and the companies needed the business.  I saw an example of this innovation a few months ago, but first a little background. 

During the Summer, after over a year of trying to figure out what I was doing with my “post-Corporate” life, besides diving into movies and this blog, I was talking with my friend Melissa.  She was telling me about some volunteer work she was doing with a charity organization.  I said “Yeah, I’ve been thinking about doing something like that, but I don’t know what I want to do.”  In reality, I didn’t know where to start and she (thankfully) nudged me in the right direction, sending me a few websites to check out.  I stumbled upon an opportunity that looked interesting and connected with SCORE, a national organization of volunteers who mentor small business owners.  Before I knew it, I was onboard with the local chapter and six months later, I am thoroughly enjoying it.  We provide mentoring services to small business owners across a variety of topics, based on our individual specialties.  Mine is Finance, so if someone needs help in that area, I provide them guidance.  And if they need help in other business areas, I can bring in one of my fellow mentors to join our next session.  We also teach workshops and webinars on specific topics for people who are starting a business, or need help improving their current business.  Everything is virtual now, but we are still able to connect with our clients in a personal way.  One of my clients is a manufacturer whose business was booming until the pandemic hit.  When customer orders slowed way down, they innovated to produce new products for different customers to keep the revenue coming in and the lights on.  They’ve been in business for over twenty years and hearing their story about how proud they are that they could keep things going, and not have to lay anyone off, was truly inspiring.  I will think of their story quite frequently when I am looking for inspiration during difficult times.

What Happens Next?

As the year comes to a close, I’ve been wondering if down the road, we will look at 2020 as a lost year.  If actions had been taken sooner, both in the public health and political spaces, we might have escaped this quicker, and with far fewer devastating consequences.  But despite all of the sadness and sorrow of 2020, we all grew in a way that led us to appreciate the many things that we may have taken for granted.  And yes, there were a few glimpses of happiness.  We saw communities rally together to help those in need.  We saw heroism from health care workers as they fought to care for patients during a very scary time.  We still found ways to laugh, even if we were wearing masks.  Millions of people found new ways to celebrate weddings, birthdays, and graduations in creative ways.  Pet adoption soared as people decided they wanted a quarantine pet to help with their loneliness.  I know two people who had babies during the pandemic, and there is nothing more precious in this world than a new baby.

We also had a profound moment of happiness with the news that a safe and effective vaccine had been created, demonstrating a remarkable scientific feat.  Now, throughout this past year, I have reminded you that I have no professional training in the areas of science and medicine, so I will just say that I will be taking it when I have the opportunity, and leave it at that.  A few weeks ago, I saw a former colleague sharing his vaccine experience on a video chat.  He is the medical director of a company that operates nursing homes, so he was on the early list.  At the end of his comments, which were all positive, he shared a hashtag – #thisisourshot.  It gave me a smile and a sense of hope.

And that’s what we need, right?  Hope.  That’s what we want for our children – hope that they will have a better life than we did.  That’s what we think about as the calendar turns to a new year – hope that this year will be better than last year.  Of course, for 2021, that bar is incredibly low, it has to be better, right?  OK, you’re right – let’s not jinx it.  I laughed when my friend Bill told me he was glad he woke up and saw that it was January 1^st and not December 32^nd. 

Now, with the calendar changing, it’s not like our lives will get instantly better, like turning on a light.  As medical professionals have described it, we should think about a dimmer switch getting brighter as the days and weeks pass.  And while we are still in a very dark place, the metaphor of brighter days ahead is one I will grasp onto.  This past year, we have come to appreciate so much more in our lives.  When things improve and we start to experience the bigger things (going to a concert or a sporting event) or the little things (seeing family in person and sharing a hug), we will realize that while 2020 was a challenge unlike any other and we cannot forget those who were lost, we persevered and made it through to the other side.

Onward…..